Golf

It’s odd that the word ‘atheist’ even exists. I don’t play gold, is there a word for non-golf players? Do they gather and strategize? I can’t do that. I can’t gather around and talk about how much everybody in the room doesn’t believe in God. Neil deGrasse Tyson

I don’t play golf either. I don’t even care that my friends play golf, no matter how dumb the game is. Live and let live is what I say.
I just get kind of pissed off when golfers:
. demand that high school gym classes be converted into golf classes
. claim that only golfers should be allowed to hold public office
. tell me I’m not a good parent because I don’t send my kid to golf class
. take away people’s access to medical treatment for non-golf-related sports injuries
. indoctrinate children into a life of golf and tell them that all other sports are immoral and shouldn’t even be tried
. use it as a justification to launch wars against other golf leagues
. port the official golf rule book in public buildings and court houses
. shun people and disown family members who don’t like to play golf
. and for fuck’s sake, why don’t golf clubs have to pay tax?
The point is, maybe if golfers would shut the fuck up and stop trying to force their game on the rest of society, the minority of people who don’t play gold might not be so touchy about this stuff.

Say no to proselytising lunatics today…

So, you have come to our door with the intent to convert members of this household to your religion.
That is super-duper and we’re very excited about it! However, please take a moment to study this notice before you knock, so as to most profitably waste as little as possible of our mutual time, please understand that unless your religion or idea in full meats all of the following requirements:
Your idea must completely respect and preferably actively promote and endorse all of this:
Reason
. rejection of superstition and non-scientific explanations of origins, causes, effects and completely explicable physical phenomena.
. unrestricted expression of limitless pursuit of truth, love, beauty, knowledge, fairness and equality.
Equal rights
. for any and all consenting adults to respect and freely love and marry one another
. for men and women alike to enjoy full participation in society as free and sovereign individuals
Sanctity
. of a person’s right to reject an idea, exit a relationship, or leave a religion, at their sole discretion.
. a woman’s right to terminate a pregnancy of she finds this necessary

Additionally, your idea show include or promote none of this:
Sin
Fear
Guilt
Magic
Taboo
Heresy
Crusade
Chastity
Prophesy
Miracles
Afterlife
Ignorance
Atonement
Mutilation
Prohibition
Punishment
Abomination
Discrimination
Condemnation
Commandments
Sacred Ideas
Space Aliens

Then we regret to have to inform you that we have absolutely no interest in whatever it is that you are promoting.
For this reason we must ask you to please leave swiftly and in silence, and to never again darken our doors.

The door knocker idiots came to spruik their nonsense the other day.