If Jesus returned…

So I get back to Earth and they’ve put all these crosses everywhere and I’l like what the fuck…
You think if JFK comes back he wants to see fucking sniper rifles everywhere?

14 thoughts on “If Jesus returned…”

    1. This is going to seem unbelievable to you: I don’t sit on my computer yearning for theists to come by and quote their bible to me. Threats from your bible don’t bother me because I don’t believe that your bible represents reality. I much the same way as Qoranic threats of hell for following Jesus the false prophet don’t bother you.

      Do you lose any sleep worrying that dragons will eat you… maybe you do! Jesus might send the Leviathan to eat you because you masturbate too much! Ha! You just thought about masturbating so you sinned in your heart which is the same as committing the sin – according to your bible – so leviathans are probably coming to eat you right now! Don’t say I didn’t warn you.

  1. Hey man thanks for the comments. -Ryan

    To reply to comment, I’m not sure what to think of any oracle. I think they’re about as reliable as that naked chick from ‘300’. Thanks for posting!

  2. Pingback: …never believe
  3. Or:1) Mary was chosen by God to be the beaerr of the Messiah, on account of being a worthy person. (That would be impregnation, but it’s a crude inference.)2) Had trouble convincing a skeptical husband of the truth, but eventually prevailed.3) Gave birth to Jesus Christ who would go on to die for the sake of humanity.Which is actually what the account given in the surviving documentation of the period reflects.I’m not sure what your particular theory is based on, but I think I prefer historical accounts as opposed to musing without evidence.

    1. Hilarious stuff, Sagar. You actually believe this stuff. A magic guy hiding behind clouds magically fathering children. What about the Easter Bunny? Do you believe in him too?

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